Have you ever thought of what kind a of person are you? in the sense of how you approach people or deal with stuffs. Are you a direct person? or an indirect person?
Walking about in certain public places, let's say shopping malls. Here's the scenario, in shopping malls, a closed air conditioned place, smoking is definitely forbidden in it. But what you see is an idiot (sorry) smoking happily. Question- what is your course of action when you see this? and how do you carry out whatever you plan to do? Of course if you too are a fellow smoker you wouldn't mind him I guess. I'm talking about the ones who hates smokers and cigarette smoke. WOULD you confront that person directly, and politely say please don't smoke here? or you would try to keep a distance, indirectly showing that you don't like it.
Now, why do we go for direct approach? I think it's because we want immediate result. We want to show that we are right and we are trying to tell the wrong-doer or whatever you call the person to change whatever he or she is doing that distresses you. Direct approach, never fails to make someone "hate" you though. Although that "hate" is very subjective and for how long it lasts, is another matter. Maybe just the spur of the moment, then it goes away after thinking, or it stays for a little while longer.
As for the indirect approach, which I think is the more popular one,usually we do this for the fact that it's the softer choice of the two. What I meant here is that this style is the "jaga hati orang" approach, that's the term that can be used in Malay. That's one of the reason that I can think of. However sometimes I wonder, by using this approach, are we actually cheating ourselves? in trying to make other people happy, we share, we tolerate something that we actually don't want. Well, maybe "cheating" is too harsh of a word. Perhaps we're just closing one eye and go along with it. Or we're kind enough to bear with it.
Personally, I'm a 40/60 guy on the direct/indirect matter. Oh well. Doesn't matter I guess whichever method you apply. It's like in football, either you play 30 passes together before you score a goal like Barcelona, or you can play a long high ball just like the old Bolton Wanderers team and score. At the end of the day , both yields results. It's all good then. Peace.